Wednesday 29th July
We set off from Nafplio with no idea of our destination. Probably Athens, but maybe not. Our first stop for the day was Mycenae, a short drive from Nafplio. I’ve got to say, it wasn’t the most informative or inspiring site (although geographically impressive), and despite the howling wind, it was still unbearably hot, so we beat a hasty retreat to an air conditioned Mack and headed towards the Corinth Canal.
The Corinth Canal: a feat of barely believable engineering from some time about a billion years ago. We were all excited to see it, ideally with ships almost scraping the sides. So when we drove over in 4 seconds and then accidentally got onto the motorway with the next exit in 6 miles, we totally should have turned around and gone back. But we didn’t. So……. 🤷🏼♀️
And so we arrived in Athens. I’d managed to book a reasonably central hotel with a rooftop pool whilst sitting in the car park at Mycenae. Apart from a couple of wrong turns and having no clue about roundabout etiquette in Greece (whoops), the drive was fine. Parking a 6 metre van in what felt like the narrowest street in Greece was less fine. Especially when being aided by a shouty Ukrainian weightlifter.
Said Ukrainian then proceeded to inform me (he was trying to be helpful!) that this area wasn’t safe and that I should take the bikes off the back because they would definitely be stolen otherwise. Hey, welcome to Athens, it’s dangerous and unsafe here but have a great time anyway! Not exactly a good start.
A quick dip in the pool, with a fabulous view of the Acropolis was good but didn’t do much to restore our spirits. “I hate it here” was the most common refrain of the afternoon.
Dinner at Rafiki was a TripAdvisor recommendation – I’m normally pretty skeptical of these but this place sounded authentic and was a 10 minute walk (down some horrible streets) from our apartment. The food was excellent – by far the best we’d eaten in Greece – and we vowed to return. And then we ubered back to our digs. Oh, Uber, how I’ve missed you!
Thursday 30th July
The smalls were exhausted and grumpy and had no intention of going anywhere, so we had a pyjama day. I read a whole book. Bliss! We left only to get dinner at a place called Seychelles – another great choice!
Friday 31st July
A properly shit day. We went first to M&S where I bought some shorts to replace my beloved, beleaguered 15 year old blue ones, which went in the bin.
Next, to the National Archaeological Museum where the queuing system was illogical, frustrating and slow, involving waiting outside in the baking sunshine for 40 minutes. Once inside, there were demands for food and then an “I don’t want anything, I don’t like the food here” meltdown which led to a massive meltdown on my part – tears and snot – which in turn led to Tubs crying, Kitty crying and Zander doing his best to cheer us all up.
After the cafe debacle, we headed round the museum with reasonable haste – lots of willies, boobies and bums for Tubs to count, and enough vases that even I declared that this was fucking boring and shall we go now.
Here is a boring story which just reassured me that getting Ubers is a good habit to have. I asked the taxi driver waiting outside the museum to take us to the bottom of the Lycabettus funicular. He told me it was only going every hour and would cost 17€ each. Easier, he said, to drive up (about 25€) as it was free on the way down. Hook, line and sinker. And then tried to fleece me for 35€ – thankfully I didn’t actually have that much on me. I think Uber would have charged about 8.50€. Arsehole.
Still, it was very lovely up there and we had a little wander round, some ice cream (I even let them have Coca Cola if they wanted – that’s how bad the day was). And of course we had no cash left to pay for the down leg of the funicular (11€, 20€ return. For all of us. Every 30 minutes. Arsehole) and no juice left in my phone.
Luckily there are some good people in the world and the guy running the funicular was one of them. He let us go down to the bottom of the short but enjoyable ride and pay the lady with by card.
At this point Kitty, who had developed a weird rash the night before, started feeling sick (it was 43 degrees). The remainder of the afternoon’s activities were binned in favour of a quick wander through the national gardens and a metro ride back to the hotel.
Oh. My bank card also got refused at 3 separate ATMs leaving us with the grand sum of €20 belonging to Zander in cash. Just shit.
Saturday 1st August
Kitty had been reading an Athens guide from the hotel reception and spotted “Allou Fun Park!”. In a bid to cheer them all up, I got the nice people at Uber to take us there with the intention of staying for just a few hours.
5 hours later, having sampled pretty much every ride in the place about 20 times (thankfully it was basically only us there!), I finally got them back to the hotel for a quick pre-dinner swim. We were going to head into the centre to visit the Acropolis and then have dinner with a view. But a massive thunderstorm broke out and the fear set in, so we ditched the adventurous in favour of familiarity and returned to Rafiki for another fantastic supper.
Sunday 2nd August
Having had such a disastrous visit to Athens thus far, I decided that we were not going to leave without visiting the Acropolis. I told the kids it was against the law to come to Athens and not see it.
I booked a studio apartment in the old town of Plaka and drove somewhat nervously into the centre of the city. First stop was a fantastic little cafe called Stani, famed for the variety of yoghurt they serve (thanks Gilly!). The children managed to eat four plates of yoghurt, honey and nuts and a cake each.
We returned to the car, relieved to find it still there and ventured on into the old heart of Athens. Needless to say, it had more than it’s fair share of narrow streets and after only 3 wrong turns we found the parking spot and the studio.
I promptly left my hot babies in the air con and went for a massage in the hammam next door. Relaxing though it was, an hour of much-needed child-free time wasn’t long enough,b so I popped back and collected them for an ice cream – the best since Amarino! – before depositing them back in the cool of the studio and going out for an hour’s walk around Plaka.
In a blissful 40 minutes, I covered the little architectural gem of Anafiotika, the Roman Agora, Hadrian’s Library and Plaka’s touristy souvenir-filled streets (anyone know what’s with the wooden knob stall?).
A particular souvlaki restaurant had been suggested to us, so we trudged off there and wolfed down some beef, lamb and chicken souvlaki with a nice chilled salad. (Only joking: I do, of course, mean wine.)
Monday 3rd August
An early start with my crowd is never an easy one. Especially not when combined with packing up our stuff, reloading the van, finding an ATM and buying breakfast. But miraculously we were 3 whole minutes early for our tour with Alternative Athens.
Ifi, the tour guide, was a real character and she presented throughout the tour from the perspective of Greek mythology. The Acropolis is breathtaking and the stories she told really brought it to life. Once again, we also had the place pretty much to ourselves. Three hours was perhaps a bit longer than we needed but I was glad that we had done it and the little creatures claimed to have enjoyed it.
The mere hint of a sushi option for lunch revived all three hot babies, and we arrived at the Noodle Bar very very excited. It didn’t disappoint and we left the Noodle Bar with very very full tummies and quite a light purse.
With Mack fully loaded, it was time to set off for our last wander around a “pile of old rubble”. No more rubble, they have decreed, after Delphi. Lol….. we shall see!
Madre di Trio 
Thank heavens for sushi! xxx